Here there are 10 tips for new forty-year-old surfer, jealous of twenty-year-old surfer:
1) surfing can not make your ego stronger when you’ll see an Australian out of the water with his surfboard and his drier and outlined physical like some Greek Goddess.
2) surfing is a sport for people already trained. Having the belly of a walrus is not necessarily a plus!
3) after the tenth facade taken trying to get out of the waves, it’s best to smile and pretend nothing’s happened. It’s time to go back to the beach to drink a Bintang (Popular Bali Beer) with the excuse “I thirst”!
4) Do not ever tie lace of the surf board to your ankle. Being shorter than that one of the surf board, it’s easy to go directly to hit your “macarones ”
5) Always wear a Tshirt to get 3 benefits immediately: do not burn your back like a cordon bleu, you do not scratch your belly like you’ve been passed for 30 minutes with the sandpaper and last, but not least, hide 35 years of sausages and lentils.
6) when you go out from the sea devastated and beaten like a nail, you ignore it and smile for the second time, trying to lay down where the sand is already dry.
7) if, but I say if, after great efforts and titanic attempts you have finally managed to overcome the facades and, if, by chance, you have a space in the middle of 150 surfers to finally take a wave, try to take your time to think why the other 150 surfers are running away !! WTF!!
8) if you are survived in point 7 and you have only two fractured ribs but you can move your jaw a few centimeters, try to smile for the third time. If you really can not, then evaluates the fact of buying mask, snorkel and fins and make snorkeling.
9) the second day when you go back to the beach do not repeat the first 8 points. Rent directly a hammer and break your hand to have immediately a good excuse to keep you out from the figure of the old.
10) when you have finished to break your hand, smile for the fourth time pretending nothing’s happened for the fourth time, then sit down on your deck chiar and order twenty Bintang!
A Jealous neo surfer